What's the fastest thing in Africa?

Light
A horse walks into a bar.
The bartender says: "Why the long face?"
The horse says: "Evolution".

http://explosm.net/comics/4461/

What do you call a 7 year old girl with no hair?

A cancer victim.
Do you know what is odd?

Every other number
What two states don't have running water?

Solid and gas
A platypus walks into a bar.

They are the only mammal that lays an egg.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

Nobody
My girlfriend is like an iPhone 7.

She doesn't have a headphone jack.
Your mother is so loose you must tell me who her chiropractor is.

I'm looking for one to ease the tension